Compliments

[Yo-Hahn]

My mom raised me to compliment people freely. Not to lie and bullshit like we all do up here in politics of Sacramento. So I do, if someone looks good I tell them.

Sometimes I wonder though how people take it?

Example: You compliment a female do they think that I full of shit or wanting to get together with them.

Example2: I complimented this guy on his suit, will people think I am gay?

I know a lot of how people take it is your deliver, tone, modes. So you have to try to read all those. Why can't we (I) just say what I think freely. I usually do and not care what people think.

Questions:
Is it lame to compliment people on how they look (hair, dress, body parts, etc...)?

Do you like to get compliments?

[goDESS]

Yo-Hahn,

I love getting compilments when it's someone I like or someone I know isn't harboring lust fantasies for me.

Example: I recently got my hair cut and my boss (who is really nice) said he liked it. That was nice and made me feel good.

Example: The guy in the office a couple down from me is a total lurker. Once I was wearing capri pants and walked by his office. He followed me into mine and walked behind my desk and said he had nice calves (or can I lick them?). GROSS! I, of course totally froze and had no witty comeback. Then one day I was sick and he asked how I was and I said I felt horrible, he looked at me and said that I didn't look horrible (or I would do you right now, barfing or not).

So, be careful about complimenting people who are disgusted by your lust for them (if there are any) and keep the compliments vague and not too detailed, like "Cool shirt" not "Oh I love the way that shirt contours your breasts. You have a nice shape, may I feel them?"

I always compliment guys on their clothes when they are cool. Does that mean that they think I am trying to pick up on them?

------------------
goDESS

[princess b]

I (as usual) must agree with goDESS. Compliments are nice, but one must be genuine about them. Don't compliment a woman on her new haircut while you are visibly licking your lips and totally eye-locked on her boobs.

Compliments on clothes and other style components are always cool, but the best is when a stylish man notices the little details and comments upon those.

I'm a sucker for a man (well dressed of course, DKNY suits are nice) who notices cool shoes. In keeping with what goDESS said - the way NOT to compliment a women on her shoes is to say - "nice shoes, they'd look even better in the air."

That generally won't work.

[caleb]

princess b, you mean like the time I complimented you on your corrective foot-wear?

[Yo-Hahn]

So complimenting with a little sexual inuendo is not good, what if you know they are not lusting or you know that they are not a threat of lusting or you are OK with it? Is it OK then?

goDESS your story sounds like straight up harassment!

Sincerity is the key and that is all about delivery, similar to foreplay, you have to mean it or it seems too shallow and for another purpose.

goDESS, if you compliment a guy, it kind of depends on all the factors we have said above on if they misread it or not.