View Full Version : The Middle Urinal
JBMoney
08-27-02, 12:59 PM
What kind of person does it take to always grab the middle urinal in a three urinal restroom?
This bugs the hell out of me and my first thoughts are that either:
1) The guy is gay.
2) The guy thinks he is Lord of the Universe.
On our floor there is rarely more than two people in the restroom at one time, and three urinals. By all rules of dudeness, taking the middle urinal in a three urinal line-up automatically forces everyone else to the stalls (unless it's like a damn football game or rock concert). WHY????
I've identified at least three people on our floor that ALWAYS grab the middle urinal. One of these guy's circumference is greater than his height and every freaking time I come in he's in the middle. I come in, he looks back knowingly (he can't possibly be unaware that he's breaching dude etiquette), I hit the stall.
I try to put myself in their shoes and I still don't get it. The only thing I could possibly come up with is that you take the middle urinal because YOU WANT to force everyone to the stalls. That is too risky though as you might get that one weirdo who wants to be social during your moment (with that one guy, there is no way you could use a urinal on the end without touching).
I don't get it. Some people got issues.
LOL..that's too funny.
I've had people follow me into the head while asking for computer help (seriously). Next time somebody does that to me I'm going to turn around and piss on them...sheesh.
No class at all.
You know, the rules are basic. It's not that hard. Take this simple test...
http://bressler.org/bits/urinal.exe
Whew..passed that with flying colors:)
oooooooooooooo... man I couldn't agree with you more JB! :nolike:
I also hate when it's a little wet around the base of the urinal (and you know it's pee) so your shoes squeak when you walk back down the hall. How hard is it to pay attention to where you're aiming?
yuck.
The middle urinal shoul be for show only, purposely put their as a buffer zone.
It takes a real sick, sick man to use the middle urinal.
wrecker05
08-27-02, 11:12 PM
I hate those kind of people. :nolike: Damn homos :nolike::mad:
I am starting to think you are all a little intimidated.
Barb101
08-28-02, 07:17 AM
Ya know what's weird, the same thing happens in the ladies room!:scary: :hehe:
Hey Barb, got any "good" stories about the ladies room??;)
Rguess21
08-28-02, 06:36 PM
:confused: urinals in da ladies room, ya sure your going in the right door Barb? ;)
Originally posted by Rguess21
:confused: urinals in da ladies room, ya sure your going in the right door Barb? ;)
Maybe she pees like this chick...:scary: :nuts: ...
That is one image I woulda have preferred to skip tonight......Jeeeezzzzzz....Thanks JDub. :what:
Barb101
08-29-02, 12:28 AM
Lol, No I'm going in the right room. The one with the dress on right??!:hehe:
No I meant the stalls, everyone knows we don't have wall urinals
except where JDub goes :scary: ;)
I hate it when some chick grabs the middle stall! That means I can't go next to hers or she'll think I'm a lesbian or something:D
~~~Being totally sarcastic...Barb~~~
;)
What about the people who think they own the world and go into the Handicap stall......and I don't mean the people that it was designed for.
You know they are naked in there... they are the type of person who sets up shop when performing the daily ritual.........magazines, newspapers, croswword puzzles.....they are in for the long haul.....and they mean business.
And people....while we are on the topic........don't forget the courtsey flush
JB I feel your pain. Following the proper well-known dude rules I walked up to a urinal the other day at the movies and took the urinal on the far end. A few seconds later some old dude walks up and takes the urinal right next to me. No one else around and he decides to get chummy with me. What is wrong with these people. Everyone with a dick should know better. Maybe they are foreigners or something. Perhaps they use different bathroom fixtures in their country of origin and they get confused when they walk into a civilized restroom. I guess I just figured that even French people pissing into holes in the floor could figure this one out.
Hmmmm...I think once you reach a certain age you can use any stall you want. Somewhere around 65 or 70. Hell at that age who cares anymore. They probably love the company.
Also they're allowed to fart anywhere and anytime. They just blame it on their age and its kinda a given. I had one old guy just rip one off inside the Getty Museum a couple of weeks ago. It was just him and my wife daughter and I in this one exhibit. It totally resonated off the walls and my daughter started cracking up. He just looked over and smiled like he was doing it just for my daughters entertainment. We casually walked out and then busted a gut.:what:
Someone say fart? :rolleyes:
http://www.gamers-forums.com/smilies/contrib/legionxs/fart.gif
Bucko, I've noticed the same thing. What is so strange to me is that usually, the old guys never even acknowledge that they just farted. This makes me think that they don't even realize it was them. Even if someone doesn't actually say "my bad" or something to that affect, you can just look at their face and know it was them. However, these old guys don't even have the look of guilt in their face. I'm thinking that maybe you lose control when you get that old and you don't even feel the sensation of passing gas. Kinda like when they run a red light without ever realizing it was there.
JBMoney
08-29-02, 04:27 PM
I just went to the bathroom and there were two guys standing next to each other, with a urinal on the end open.
I think the pod people are here.
ROFL @ JB...pod people. I think I can top this, actually. I work in a building with six other guys and that's it. We have a single urinal/single stall for each men and women. Then we have two single-unit shitters in each of the training rooms (which are NEVER in use). So if we've got four separate rooms all roughly the same distance from our offices, and only seven total people to use them, how come EVERY F($*ing time I go to take a piss, one of these numbnuts decides he wants to take a greaser in the bathroom I'M IN!?!?:scary: :mad:
Originally posted by jhansberger
I'm thinking that maybe you lose control when you get that old and you don't even feel the sensation of passing gas. Kinda like when they run a red light without ever realizing it was there.
LOL...that just cracked me up, but you're right jhansberger, I had an old man blow one off while I was behind him at the DMV. It was like he never even acknowledged I was even there???
He had to have felt himself expelling 6 quarts of methane??? I've never held my breath for so long in my life. He just did his business and waddled off.:confused:
I hate using a urinal in bare feet when the last bloke didn't stand close enough.
Rguess21
08-30-02, 12:58 AM
well then, keep your shoes on. but i don't know how you manage to keep your balance, standing on that raised, rounded piece of metal covering the drain :confused:
Pistol Pete
08-30-02, 04:58 PM
We had one guy in quotations that would take off his pants and shoes when took a dump, put them in a pile, and would haul all his papers in there with him (YUCK!) One of the women wanted to know when he was in there so she could dash in and snatch his clothes :hehe: He stopped bringing the papers after the boss found out about it because customer service said they weren't touching anything he had been in contact with.:nono:
Pistol Pete
08-30-02, 07:14 PM
Amazingly he looked a lot like him:scary: Although this guy would also make as loud and obnoxious noises as possible so everyone would know he was in the building. You know the type; stand a few feet away from you while you're working and talk as loud as he could about shit no human gives a damn about, or cough in your direction so you'll get sick too. He did that once to me and a co-worker and I punched him right square in the chest. He just heaved and wandered off whining.:D
JBMoney
09-09-02, 01:10 PM
Some guy with an ear ring (left side) just took the urinal next to me, instead of the one on the end. :mad:
What is proper procedure in a two urinal, three stall bathroom....I always take a stall if someone is at one of the urinals.
The other day, I walked in just ahead of someone from another office, feeling that I was technically there first I used the urinal....sure enough, he stood next to me to do his business.
I almost chuckled thinking of this thread.
Originally posted by JBMoney
Some guy with an ear ring (left side) just took the urinal next to me, instead of the one on the end. :mad:
:fbomb: What's the ear ring got to do with it?? Are you making generalizations about d3wds with earrings? or d3wds with poor urinal etiquette??:confused:
JBMoney
09-09-02, 04:02 PM
I don't know if the earing has anything to do with it... However, the combination of an earing and taking the middle urinal next to someone, may indicater a larger problem.
I think Dubya wants us to look out for exactly this type of behavior, especially considering the timing.
I have come to the conclusion that there are women out there as gross and disgusting as men when it comes to bathroom etiquette. In the building where I work (which is quite small with only 5 other suites and about 75% women), that there are some women on this planet who don't know how to flush a toilet. It seems, just of late, that everytime I go to use the building's restrooom (with only 3 stalls, btw) that I am always having to search the room over for a toilet that's been flushed.
Do they do this at home? Do these women pee or poop at home and leave it in the bowl for other people to see? Are they wanting scores (YEAH, a 6.9!)? No, I think not. I think these women are just plain lazy and generally just too gross to exist.
Originally posted by JBMoney
Some guy with an ear ring (left side) just took the urinal next to me, instead of the one on the end. :mad:
Try this J.B. when someone does thais again sort of hold back a bit.When they have almost finished raise the elevation slightly shift the windage slightly their way then give it all you've got.Once someone has experienced serious splash back they quickly learn some manners.
Did you ever observe the lack of hand washing that goes on, that is about as digusting as it gets....these non hand washers are also in the kitchenettes touching food and whatnot........Yuck!!!
Originally posted by micron
Try this J.B. when someone does thais again sort of hold back a bit.When they have almost finished raise the elevation slightly shift the windage slightly their way then give it all you've got.Once someone has experienced serious splash back they quickly learn some manners.
This should work also... sneeze on him. :D
No shit!! In college we did an experiment in biology. We went to the restroom and did swabs of all the things in there. Came to find out that the dirtiest object (containing the most bacteria and whatnot) was the freaking door handle to the restroom because of the people that do not wash when they're done. I never want to touch the damn thing whenever I go to a public one. Damn dirty ass people!!
Originally posted by Laurie
I have come to the conclusion that there are women out there as gross and disgusting as men when it comes to bathroom etiquette.....
Laurie, back in the 70's my Dad was a plant engineer for Bell Northern Research. He used to get all the trade mags and he told me of this one article he read. It was about workplace bathrooms and how the employees treated them. Men, far and away left the bathroom looking pretty much the same way it was when they walked in. Women on the other hand..... let's just say that the highest percentage trash item that ended up on the floor instead of the can were feminine "specific" products. He said the stories he got from the janitors at BNR pretty much confirmed the article. I'm almost afraid to do a Google search on this....
FWIW
People at work usually make fun of me because I bitch about left over halves of bagels, donuts, sandwiches and whatever in the kitchen. It's usually the women who are always guilty of this. I explained the whole sneezing/coughing into your hands, picking wedgies, dirty doorknobs and still I was told I was being anal. I guess guys aren't the only slobs.
Like a friggen half a donut is gonna put them over the edge and add to that extra 20 pounds they're trying to lose. Either eat the whole damn thing or stick to your diet and walk away.....*huff huff puff puff* what happened did I lose it again? oh-oh, I think I got a little off topic.
:what:
Originally posted by cuda
oh-oh, I think I got a little off topic.
:what:
Well, since you drifted off path..... ;)
We have the same problem here. They even use half a artificial sweetener packet and leave the other half on the counter.... like someone else is going to use it and if they're going to use it later then take it with ya! Sheesh, and don't get me started with the women having broken arms when it comes to making a new pot of coffee. :fbomb:
(Not bashing women here, cause I luv em so much)
I think they leave the half because they want everyone to see that they only ate half....silly I know but what is even funnier is when they break out the knife and start cutting pieces off the half.
On another note....take a ride at lunch time and notice how many women you see riding in the car choking down a burger they just purchased at a drive thru...it is quite amusing...these are the same gals who consume a yogurt in the office for lunch and then say they have to run an errand.....yeah right:hehe:
but we pee on the seat...so I guess all is balanced in the world
Pistol Pete
09-10-02, 04:31 PM
There have been a couple of guys I worked with that did something I've never been able to figure out; They would come in the restroom, wash their hands, and then pee :confused:
Were they afraid they'd get dirt on their dicks, or what? And then they'd leave without washing again! But, I saw one of them pay $200 for a ball-point pen, once. :what:
JBMoney
09-10-02, 05:11 PM
That's a good call, but you should wash after too.
Think about it, your hands are, on average, probably the least clean external surface of your body (especially after touching that bathroom door). Your cock is probably one of the cleanest external surfaces on your body (except for possibly sweat) as it's generally covered by at least two layers of clothing.
Take care of your cock folks, and your cock will take care of you.
We have two women in my office. Both of them are always eating half a donut or pastry or whatever else and leaving the other half in the box. I figured it was due to their guilty conscious over being fat. Perhaps if they only eat half they feel like they really didn’t do a bad thing. But worse than these women’s guilty feelings over being fat, is the fact that we have a guy in the office that always gets into the donut box and tares a donut in half and eats the first half and then walks over to my desk and says “here, I didn’t feel like eating the whole thing”. It’s one thing to leave it in the box to assuage your guilt about being fat but it is just un-manly to put the pressure on me to eat the other half.
Comic Book Guy
09-10-02, 10:17 PM
rule) if you don't make eye contact with the the other people in the bathroom, they were never in there with you.
PS::anybody in here feeling a little insecure?? You're not working with Ron Jeremy, are you?
How about the guys who stand back, hands on hips, using the no-touch method......those are some proud fellas
I work in an office with one bathroom that we all share. Of course, I'm the only woman. There are two spots fairly high up on the wall behind the commode that are plainly handprints. I clean them off.. they come back. I've seen guys do this when they're drunk... or half asleep...do you all do this?
Heavens no..the only guys that can do that are the ones that nature hasn't been good to.:D
Kimmy.....ask them why they are there
Originally posted by Bucko
Heavens no..the only guys that can do that are the ones that nature hasn't been good to.:D
Are you serious?
Hell ya he's serious. You’ve got to keep your balance standing on that stepstool. I mean, during the summer it’s not a problem but during the winter that water is just too damn cold to let your danglely touch the bottom of the bowl.;)
Oh, Jhans.. I was talking about NORMAL men... not the awe inspiring 'members' we have on the board here ;)
seriously...is it just the 'little' guys that lean on the wall?
Oh, in that case it wasn't me.
They lean forward so they don't dribble pee pee on their pants, so they balance themselves with one hand against the wall:D
Barb101
09-11-02, 04:33 PM
The perfect urinal for the paranoid homophobic male??:p
JBMoney
09-11-02, 04:40 PM
Right like I want someone taking that one across from me and looking me lovingly in the eyes as I do my business. Sheesh... :what:
Originally posted by Kimmy
Oh, Jhans.. I was talking about NORMAL men... not the awe inspiring 'members' we have on the board here ;)
seriously...is it just the 'little' guys that lean on the wall?
Yep..otherwise it's like a out of control water hose. You gotta grab and tame that beast.;)
Originally posted by JBMoney
Right like I want someone taking that one across from me and looking me lovingly in the eyes as I do my business. Sheesh... :what:
I never look around. I'm busy trying to destroy that urinal cake.:rolleyes:
Does anyone remember Whizzers? They were these little pieces of paper that had pictures of ships etc on them. You tore a couple of them off, tossed them in the bowl and then tried to sink them.:)
JBMoney
09-11-02, 07:10 PM
D()()D, j()() 4r3 ()1d!1!1!
Ever since man crawled out of the primordial ooze, he has built himself structures to contain the processes of bodily waste removal. These have been known as "restrooms," "bathrooms," "outhouses," "commodes," "men's rooms," and several other names. As with any exclusive organization, wholly half the human race aren't allowed through the door, and a number of exceedingly complicated customs have arisen to maintain a sense of order and dignity.
General rules:
- Don't talk to somebody you don't know. You may chat quietly with an acquaintance, but must absolutely not call attention to yourself.
- A quick glance in the mirror is permissible, but absolutely don't spend a significant time arranging hair, clothing, etc. Zit popping is only permissible after checking to see nobody else is around.
- No profanity of any kind. This is reserved for locker rooms, only.
- If you must wait, form a single-file line, ragged, and be sure to keep looking around. Read graffiti.
Graffiti rules:
- All graffiti is anonymous. If there's any chance somebody can trace your graffiti back to you, don't do it.
- Writing graffiti in the open section of the bathroom is only acceptable if nobody can see you. Writing in the stalls is similarly acceptable.
- If the bathroom is sufficiently public, feel free to insult different ethnic/racial/sexual groups. If the bathroom is used by a small few, restrain comments to amusing anecdotes or chit-chat about secretaries. If visiting dignitaries from other companies or the government may tend to use the bathroom, graffiti is forbidden.
- Traditionally, all pictures feature women in various states of undress. Modern standards often include portions of male anatomy, discretely placed. Homosexual graffiti is generally frowned upon but is gaining popularity.
- Pictures must only be drawn in toilet stalls.
- Any sufficiently interesting graffiti will be painted over by the management of the bathroom.
Urinal rules:
- Always look at the wall. Looking down means you're obsessed or don't know what you're doing. Looking at other people is threatening.
- Flushing is optional. Over time, the water will become a rich orange. At this point, flushing is mandatory.
- Don't start unzipping until you're protected by the privacy of the urinal.
- Don't step back until you've thoroughly shaken off and closed your pants again.
Toilet rules:
- Reduce noise at all costs. Grunting is not acceptable.
- Always flush.
- When you find an unflushed toilet, leave it alone and use another.
Special cases:
Some university dormitories have co-ed bathrooms. New rules apply for dealing with the females...
- Never, ever, comment on how they look in the morning.
- Don't ask what the little wastebasket is for.
- If urinals are present, only use them when absolutely no females are around.
- If you are noticed by a female, try your best to ignore her presence until you're dressed again.
- Port-O-San and similar constructions are evil. Use them only if absolutely no other option is available.
- In the woods, far from civilization, restrooms typically aren't available. Get behind sufficient growth that you are completely invisible to the remainder of your party, before you begin. Check carefully that you aren't near any sort of animal or insect den. Ants are especially bad. If you forgot toilet paper, bring a leaf identifying guide. Poison oak makes a poor substitute.
We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something a brew down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those of you who hate pooping at work as much as I do, I give you the ...
ESCAPEE: A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic/embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car & speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter at the urinal, pretend that you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.
JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with escapee): When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine guns pace. This is
usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.
COURTESY FLUSH: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location.This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.
WALK OF SHAME: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk-up the shitter. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of a COURTESY FLUSH.
OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER: A colleague who poopsat work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an Out of the Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER before entering the bathroom.
THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN): This is a group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPERS and identify SAFE HAVENS.
SAFE HAVEN: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.
TURD BURGLAR: A pooper who does not realize that you're in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the TURD BURGLAR leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact. TURD BURGLARS have been known to cause premature pinchage, which inevitably causes you to pinch one off in the middle.
CAMO-COUGH: A phony cough which alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON or to alert potential TURD BURGLARS. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.
ASTAIRE: This is a subtle toe-tap that is used toalert all potential TURD BURGLARS that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an ASTAIRE, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.
WATERMELON: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a WATERMELON coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.
HAVANA OMELET: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an escapee. Try using a CAMO-COUGH with an ASTAIRE.
UNCLE TED: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An UNCLE TED makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.
FLY BY: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in, check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom
Cuda....that is classic!!!
Bushies
rule 1. Always go behind a tree.
tip.How do you tell the front of a tree from the back?
Noone ever shits in front of a tree.......fact
Butterlugs
09-13-02, 07:22 PM
Am I the only guy in the world who doesn't spit in the urinal before he flushes it?
Also the comment about doorhandles is corect. Do this, keep the paper towel in your hand, open the door and deposit it elsewhere in the facility once you are outside the door.
Seriously, one of the questions on the Minnesota Multi-Phasic Test was asking whether you were afraid to touch doorhandles. Seems like a good question in light of the college research.
last comment on pee, there is nothing worse than a 737-800 lavatory at the end of a full coast to coast flight. The stweardesses ani't going in there.
next to last. At college we had a number of foriegn students, in the dorms we alwasy had to wipe the footprints/shoemarks off the seats from the 3rd worlders we had in the dorm.
So I go to the men's room... out of the three empty urinals in there, I find some dumb ass using the middle one! WTF? Is this the first time this jackass is using a public restroom? Was this his first day on earth?
I should'a pee'd on him. :mad:
We've covered this before :p
http://bushwhacked.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=2723&highlight=mens+room
JBMoney
08-05-03, 04:30 PM
oooooooooooooo... man I couldn't agree with you more Cuda! :nolike:
I also hate when it's a little wet around the base of the urinal (and you know it's pee) so your shoes squeak when you walk back down the hall. How hard is it to pay attention to where you're aiming?
yuck.
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 05:04 PM
Yeah, what JB said. And, when they're lookin at your dick, as in your case Cuda, you don't want to make eye contact cause then they'll know you're lookin at their's.:laugh:
Merged with JB's original thread which had the same topic.
...whatever. :what:
I would still like to know why most men don't wash their hands when they have been to the toilet?
I don't know how you guys cope with someone peeing next to you either. I much prefer the privacyof my own cubicle.:)
STIBROKER
08-05-03, 08:35 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
I would still like to know why most men don't wash their hands when they have been to the toilet?
well I don't know about aussie men ......but here in texas we were taught not to pee on our hands........
Originally posted by STIBROKER
well I don't know about aussie men ......but here in texas we were taught not to pee on our hands........
But you have still been hanging on to it...............and don't you guys have to do the whole shaking thing at the end? There is nothing worse that a dribbler........:):scary: :hehe:
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 08:54 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
I would still like to know why most men don't wash their hands when they have been to the toilet?
Hey, we can pee and wash our hands at the same time. We're talented that way. :rolleyes:
Originally posted by Pistol Pete
Hey, we can pee and wash our hands at the same time. We're talented that way. :rolleyes:
hahaahahahahaha.........never thought of it that way..........:hehe: :D
STIBROKER
08-05-03, 08:57 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
and don't you guys have to do the whole shaking thing at the end? ........:):scary: :hehe:
well I just pull mine out of the bottom of the urinal ....slap it aginst
the side a couple times and that does the trick.....
Originally posted by STIBROKER
well I just pull mine out of the bottom of the urinal ....slap it aginst
the side a couple times and that does the trick.....
Sti, only you could have said something like that....lol
Does it take long to roll back up into your trousers?.........:hehe: ;)
JBMoney
08-05-03, 09:00 PM
Who said we don't wash? Maybe in Aus, but I rarely see a guy in the US walk out without washing his hands.
However, if you think about it, it's likely that a man's penis is the cleanest part of his body. It's almost always covered by two items of clothing, preventing access from all sort of airborne contaminants and dirt (e.g, people are rarely coughing germs onto my penis... ).
Here, let me show you... :hehe:
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 09:01 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
Does it take long to roll back up into your trousers?.........:hehe: ;)
He doesn't wear trousers. He hangs out in a park. :scary: :hehe:
Originally posted by JBMoney
Here, let me show you... :hehe:
I'm waiting................:hehe: :D
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 09:04 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
I'm waiting................:hehe: :D
Who are you, Methusela?
Originally posted by JBMoney
Who said we don't wash? Maybe in Aus, but I rarely see a guy in the US walk out without washing his hands.
It must be different here. Most guys I know don't wash their hands. I notice it more when we have male visitors at our house.
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 09:06 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
It must be different here. Most guys I know don't wash their hands. I notice it more when we have male visitors at our house.
It's one of those "penile" colony things. ;)
JBMoney
08-05-03, 09:15 PM
Originally posted by Pistol Pete
It's one of those "penile" colony things. ;)
*puts a mark in the 'don't ban yet' column*
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 09:20 PM
Originally posted by JBMoney
*puts a mark in the 'don't ban yet' column*
I hope that's a long friggin column :hehe:
I love this site! Beats the shit outta actual people I know. :D
Originally posted by STIBROKER
well I just pull mine out of the bottom of the urinal ....slap it aginst
the side a couple times and that does the trick.....
Yours hits the bottom of the urinal? Interesting.
Mine just drags on the floor.:sure:
:rolleyes:
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 09:24 PM
This sounds like a classic fish story in the making. :cool:
Originally posted by Pistol Pete
It's one of those "penile" colony things. ;)
Hey I was gonna say that. :o
Seaman Stains
08-05-03, 09:59 PM
A classy establishment would have restroom attendants (attractive young ladies) to hold the gents penis whilst he pisses and to shake it for him when finnished, thus saving the gent from having to wash his hands.
Originally posted by Vicky
I would still like to know why most men don't wash their hands when they have been to the toilet?
I don't know how you guys cope with someone peeing next to you either. I much prefer the privacyof my own cubicle.:)
I always wash too! Who the heck have you been hanging out with? YUCK!
I would hope you women wash also after your done. :what:
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 10:05 PM
Originally posted by cuda
I would hope you women wash also after your done. :what:
Nah, they just dab with some sort of cheezy paper. :hehe:
listen to you guys.. you have no problem with us putting it in our mouths, but you have to sanitize your hands just because you touch it :p
Pistol Pete
08-05-03, 10:12 PM
Hell, we use blow torches to sanitize. And, you just missed the chat. Slit, guys and general talk. :sure:
Ether_Elemental
08-06-03, 04:39 AM
Originally posted by Seaman Stains
A classy establishment would have restroom attendants (attractive young ladies) to hold the gents penis whilst he pisses and to shake it for him when finnished, thus saving the gent from having to wash his hands.
well if that were to happen i should hope she'd wash her hands, i don't particularly want a womans hand that has touched numerous other guys' penii then goin and touching mine, it just seems like it would be going against rules of dudeness but thinking about it i'm sure there'd me some guys who'd get off on that ... :nuts:
I don't think you will be seeing a huge line up of women wanting that job..............:D
My pecker's probably one of the cleanest things I touch all day. :D
Sideout
08-06-03, 07:14 AM
Originally posted by eagle3
My pecker's probably one of the cleanest things I touch all day. :D
Polish it to a shine, eh?
Gotta get my pound of flesh somehow.
Seaman Stains
08-06-03, 09:17 AM
Originally posted by Ether_Elemental
well if that were to happen i should hope she'd wash her hands, i don't particularly want a womans hand that has touched numerous other guys' penii then goin and touching mine, it just seems like it would be going against rules of dudeness but thinking about it i'm sure there'd me some guys who'd get off on that ... :nuts:
Of course the attendant would wash after each client, thats the beauty of the plan you would have trained professionals in charge of hygine rather than leave it to us amateur blokes!
:laugh:
Would the also wear bikini thongs? :confused:
Seaman Stains
08-06-03, 10:31 AM
Originally posted by cuda
Would the also wear bikini thongs? :confused:
Yes this would be sensible attire for the attendants as it would resisit getting wet from accidental splash back. If the attendants get wet they can shower.
Ether_Elemental
08-06-03, 02:40 PM
Originally posted by Vicky
I don't think you will be seeing a huge line up of women wanting that job..............:D
i dunno. i've said it before, there just those people that like that kinda stuff....
Originally posted by Seaman Stains
Of course the attendant would wash after each client, thats the beauty of the plan you would have trained professionals in charge of hygine rather than leave it to us amateur blokes!
:laugh:
i dunno 'bout you seaman but i've been doin that for quite a while and some of the guys out there for almost two times my lifetime and don't consider myself an ameteur :sure:
bearfoot
08-06-03, 11:53 PM
This thread is a real insight.....the goings on in a urinal are a mystery to most women.
Vicky...I'm total fanatic about hand washing and germs....a bit of a Wacko Jacko actually....never go anywhere public without handwipes,touch as little as possible in public places,I even open doors with a tissue and have taught my girl to do the same. Interestingly she is 4 and has never had a gastric bug. Hand washing is so important.
Guys, you don't have to wash your hands just because you've touched your penis, (we understand that your sacred members are immaculate).....it's because you've been in a toilet and touched the flusher,taps,doorhandle......get it.
I saw a thing on tv where they took samples from alls sorts of places to see which were the most germy.
ATMs were bad and so were the tables by the cafes in malls...both tested positive for human faeces!!!!!
And....the peanuts on the bar in pubs tested really high for the amount of urine they contain....how yuk is that hey.:scary:
Now THIS is edjumakashonall! :D
Rguess21
08-07-03, 12:15 AM
Originally posted by bearfoot
And....the peanuts on the bar in pubs tested really high for the amount of urine they contain....how yuk is that hey.:scary:
Damn, that would explain some of them being saltier. *note to self* quit shellin' the peanuts in your mouth. :confused: :OOPS: :scary:
Awh, what the hell. :beer: :laugh:
Seaman Stains
08-07-03, 12:17 AM
Originally posted by bearfoot
And....the peanuts on the bar in pubs tested really high for the amount of urine they contain....how yuk is that hey.:scary:
Perhaps peanut should be spelt peenut:laugh:
I always thought peanuts were filthy disgusting things anyway this proves it!
I don't know whether to laugh or throw up after reading some of those posts................:D
shotglass
08-07-03, 06:08 AM
Going back to Bearfoot's post....I saw a similar study, could have been the same one. The one thing that really stuck out on the list was paper money. That was one of the dirtiest objects people come into contact with.
Originally posted by bearfoot
...
I saw a thing on tv where they took samples from alls sorts of places to see which were the most germy.
ATMs were bad and so were the tables by the cafes in malls...both tested positive for human faeces!!!!!
And....the peanuts on the bar in pubs tested really high for the amount of urine they contain....how yuk is that hey.:scary:
For that reason I hate to use public phones. :p
Originally posted by Rguess21
Damn, that would explain some of them being saltier. *note to self* quit shellin' the peanuts in your mouth. :confused: :OOPS: :scary:
Awh, what the hell. :beer: :laugh:
*gets drunk and pisses in the peanuts* http://bushwhacked.net/forum/images/smilies/wankers.gif
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