Spaz59
11-13-02, 04:21 PM
Some of these you may have heard before, if so :fbomb: .
Happy Reading.
Glenn McGrath to some Zimbabwean cricketer:
"Just why are you so fucking fat tubby?"
His reply:
"Cos everytime I fuck your wife she gives me a biscuit"
Blackadder - Baldrick, you're fired.
Baldrick - (aghast) Oh, but I've been in your family since 1532!
Blackadder - So has syphilis. Now get out.
Assistant: "Sir, the Lord Privy Seal is here to see you".
Winston: "Tell the Lord Privy Seal that I am sealed in my Privy and can only deal with one shit at a time".
Nancy Astor - You're drunk.
Churchill - And you're ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.
And finally
This is an exact recount of a US National Public Radio (NPR)interview between a female broadcaster, and US Army General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy scout Troop visiting his military installation.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?"
GENERAL REINWALD: 'We're going to teach them
climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Shooting! That's a bit
irresponsible, isn't it?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see why, they'll be
properly supervised on the rifle range."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see how, ....we will be teaching them proper rifle range discipline before they even touch a firearm."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "But you're equipping them
to become violent killers."
GENERAL REINWALD: "Well, you're equipped to be prostitute, but you're not one, are you?"
The radio went silent and the interview ended.
Happy Reading.
Glenn McGrath to some Zimbabwean cricketer:
"Just why are you so fucking fat tubby?"
His reply:
"Cos everytime I fuck your wife she gives me a biscuit"
Blackadder - Baldrick, you're fired.
Baldrick - (aghast) Oh, but I've been in your family since 1532!
Blackadder - So has syphilis. Now get out.
Assistant: "Sir, the Lord Privy Seal is here to see you".
Winston: "Tell the Lord Privy Seal that I am sealed in my Privy and can only deal with one shit at a time".
Nancy Astor - You're drunk.
Churchill - And you're ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.
And finally
This is an exact recount of a US National Public Radio (NPR)interview between a female broadcaster, and US Army General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy scout Troop visiting his military installation.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?"
GENERAL REINWALD: 'We're going to teach them
climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Shooting! That's a bit
irresponsible, isn't it?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see why, they'll be
properly supervised on the rifle range."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see how, ....we will be teaching them proper rifle range discipline before they even touch a firearm."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "But you're equipping them
to become violent killers."
GENERAL REINWALD: "Well, you're equipped to be prostitute, but you're not one, are you?"
The radio went silent and the interview ended.